


A thousand timelines

by heavensweetheart



Series: Breathing words [1]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, Awkward Romance, Comfort/Angst, Drama & Romance, F/M, Feelings, Feelings Realization, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Smut, Fluff without Plot, Gentle Kissing, Intimacy, Kissing, Neck Kissing, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Romance, Romantic Fluff, Rough Kissing, Teen Romance, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, writing prompts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-07-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:07:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 11,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23622868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heavensweetheart/pseuds/heavensweetheart
Summary: A series of short stories inspired by different writing prompts.Quotes of the day:“It’s alright.” Her whisper breaks through the dimness. (This is reality.) “I am here. I am with you.”Updated with (new) images.
Relationships: Katara & Zuko (Avatar), Katara/Zuko (Avatar), Zutara - Relationship
Series: Breathing words [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1700446
Comments: 20
Kudos: 92





	1. “You don’t have to say you love me. No one means it anyways.”

**Author's Note:**

> Accompanying fanarts on the link below chapter.

**Zuko**

I’m acutely aware of Katara’s hand next to mine, its warmth is kind of overwhelming in a strange way. It somehow overheats my skin and gives me shivers at the same time.

The night sky is a little darker than usual but a vibrant space blue color, the stars are small and just opaque enough for the sky to look like a painting instead of the authentic thing. The frost of the wind is the only thing that brings reality to us as we lay outside.

“What’s on your mind?”

I turn to Katara’s voice through the corner of my eye, my stare fixes irremediably on her glowing eyes even in the darkness. (At night, they look like a mixture stone, sky and artic blue; with that combination they seem silver more than any other color.)

(They’re blinding.)

A new shiver prickles my skin. I gulp.

“Nothing,” I mutter, “Just thinking.”

“And what are you thinking about?”

She’s resting on her side to face me, her lips and eyes are smiling softly and curiously.

I return my gaze to the sky. “Not much.”

I can feel her cold breathe on my neck and cheek as she speaks. “C’mon, tell me.”

My chest heaves as I take in a deep breathe myself. “Azula,” I exhale as a forced confession, “We used to watch the stars when we were here on Ember Island together.”

The air suddenly turns chillier, but not as much as the silence; it feels like it creeps under my skin and threatens to congeal my blood.

Katara’s whisper cuts through the coldness: “You miss the sister you had then a lot, don’t you?”

I nod, and listen to the grass ruffling as I do so. “I miss the way my family was.”

The silence wraps around us again. The sky obscures with the clouds.

“You don’t have to say you love me, you know,” I admit, to both her and myself. It’s something that I should’ve said since a while ago. “No one means it anyway.”

If I didn’t know it was impossible, I would say my heart stops beating for a moment.

Then I hear more ruffling from the grass as Katara squirms closer to me. She puts her head on my shoulder and slips her hand under my shirt, placing it right over my heart. The skin to skin contact makes my skin ablaze and melt the ice inside. I continue to heat the more Katara’s tact remains.

The clouds vanish from the sky.

Her fingers flutter over my chest. “I love you, Zuko,” she murmurs quietly. “I love you, love you, love you.”

***

["You don't have to say you love me. No one means it anyways"](https://www.tumblr.com/tagged/zutara/blog/heavensweetheart/619062790712426496)


	2. “Don’t leave me now, I can’t bare it. We can go back to hating each other if it makes it easier, just don’t leave me.”

**Katara**

This trip had been a bad idea.

It is my fault that this happened, I had only been thinking about myself when we headed out to look for the man who killed my mother. I never thought what spying on the Fire Nation ships and troops entailed, I never thought we would meet with an old enemy like Zhao – (of _all_ people, _Zhao!_ ) – and that he wouldn’t miss the chance to remind Zuko of _every. Single. Thing_ his father did to him.

I can’t help but feel guilty after listening to the story, even though there was nothing I could have done to keep myself from it. I feel nauseous for finding out about Zuko’s past for somebody like Zhao.

When we were in prison together in Ba Sing Se, Zuko told me the scar was a mark of his banishment. I should have never pushed him to tell me anything about it, I didn’t have the right. I should leave him alone for the night while we rest on this coast before resuming our trip back tomorrow. This is none of my business.

But I…

“Hey,” I say, half-waving.

“Hey,” he replies, but his gaze drifts back away into the horizon.

“You okay?”

“Yes.”

_So much for a meaningful conversation._

“I was just…” I scramble my brain looking for an excuse for stepping into where I’m not called. “I just… was…”

“I’m sorry you found out like this.”

My head snaps up to look at him, and I blink, caught out of guard way too abruptly. It takes me longer than I would like to admit, but I brush off the inexplicable shock enough to ask “What do you mean?”

“I never wanted any of you guys to find out about my past for somebody else,” he explains. “I always thought about telling you, just… not now.”

“You don’t have to tell us, Zuko,” I assure him, “We are not entitled to know if you don’t want to tell us. We have no say in it. If you never want to talk about… that, then it’s okay.”

“It’s not something I like to talk about,” he explains, staring absently into the ocean under the cloudy night. “I used to mention it a lot when I was obsessed with recovering my honor by capturing Aang. That only makes it even harder to remember now.”

“I’m sorry,” I murmur.

I pause for a few seconds. I try to talk myself down from saying: “Can I ask, how did Zhao know so much about what happened during the Agni Kai?”

“He was amongst the audience that day.”

The nausea returns in full force when I imagine an Agni Kai chamber filled with people unperturbably witnessing a young boy being burned alive.

(I think I’m truly gonna vomit.)

“The fact that it was in public is not as bad as it sounds,” Zuko cuts me off, apparently reading my thoughts, “Agni Kai’s are a way of entertainment as well as duels after all. But I… when I think about my father, and Azula, and Zhao, it is…”

The silence in which his sentence turns is heavy and cutting. Even the night air around us feels sharp and unwelcome all of a sudden.

“I…” I trail off, ducking my head both for apologizing and for hiding my embarrassment at prompting such a conversation. “I guess I better leave you alone.”

I start walking away, still ashamed and feeling wounded somehow, but my steps are cut short when somebody grabs my wrist and pulls me back, holding me with a pair of muscly arms against a toned body.

I remain silent as Zuko breathes on the curve of my neck, inhaling me greedily. Desperately.

“ _Please_ , Katara, _please_ ,” his voice is no longer hard. He’s not crying, but it sounds like he could get there. “Don’t leave me now, I can’t bear it. We can go back to hating each other if it makes it easier, just don’t leave me.” 


	3. “I can’t go back to the way things were before, being with you changed everything.”

**Zuko**

“So… you’re going back to the Southern Water Tribe?”

Katara’s staring at her clothes and luggage spilled all over the bed – (it’s a wide exposition of Water Tribe accouterments and disorganized fabrics over the ruby red silk sheets) – but I stare at her instead, at her profile, awaiting to see any outward reaction. (She has been quiet and detached since we started making arrangements for everybody to departure the Fire Nation, every time we asked she said she was fine, she just had to think.)

“I…” Her phrase extends into thin air. “I’m not sure.”

My eyes widen a little in surprise. “I thought you wanted to go back. Sokka seems thrilled.”

“He is, and I thought I would be, too. But I…” She bites her bottom lip indecisively. “I don’t know. It just feels too much like a… _return_.”

“You don’t want to return?”

“That’s not what I meant,” she clarifies, “I mean it feels like… _reversing_. Like we were getting back to the beginning.”

“Maybe that’s not too bad,” I say, meditatively, “My uncle says that going back to the beginning can help you to move forward.”

She gives a light shake of head. “I don’t want to return to the person I was before.”

“You’re not returning to that person, Katara. A lot has changed.”

A startling feeling of self-consciousness triggers within me all of a sudden.

Katara turns to me, her eyes steadily directed to mine, I can almost hear a physical crash for the way our gazes clash. “You _want_ me to go back to the Tribe?” she questions.

My mouth goes slightly slack.

I don’t know how many times I blink to regain consciousness.

When I recover, Katara is still looking at me impassively, but there’s a clear anticipation behind her expression, on her eyes, she’s waiting for me to give an honest answer. The real question is, if I have made the effort to change, can I still be selfish enough to tell the truth?

Can I still want for her to stay?

“I… um…,” I look away. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have asked about what was none of my business.”

Katara opens her mouth to answer –

“I should leave you alone for you to decide by yourself,” I cut her off. “Sorry again. I’ll… see you later.”

I start to go for the door.

Katara stops me wrapping her arms around my waist.

The force of her embrace is almost crushing, I can feel her forehead pressed against my back. She’s warm.

“I can’t go back to the way things were before, Zuko,” she mutters just loudly enough for me to hear, “Being with you changed everything.”


	4. “You deserve better. It doesn’t have to be me, but you deserve better.” & “I just want you to be happy, even if your happiness doesn’t include me, I just want you to be happy.”

**Katara**

I guess Jet and I aren’t compatible after all; I’d have preferred to not realize _that_ in a theater full of people, amongst them, my friends. I turn away from the balcony’s view just enough to smack my own forehead.

After seeing _my boyfriend_ stupidly flirting with even _more_ stupid girls, I decided to hide in the terrace for a while. Or more like in the shadows of the doorframe that opens to the terrace; I don’t feel like standing under the exposing moonlight as of now. (It’s not that I’m ashamed, I just…) (Okay, maybe I do am ashamed.)

I imagine what Sokka and the others are up to after I ran off. Sokka’s probably cracking his knuckles for picking up a fight with Jet. (I really wish he didn’t, I’ve seen _snowballs_ tougher than his fists!) Toph is a much more believable of a threat. She’s likely burying Jet alive as I stand here. (Not that I am too afflicted about that.) I’m not sure what Aang could be doing, he’s above any of those revenge tactics, but I can picture Appa _“accidentally”_ sitting on top of Jet…

Huh. Maybe if Aang doesn’t arranges for Appa to… let loose, _I_ could do so instead.

A flash of memory whips me before my mind gets to wander too far.

_And of course, there is Zuko…_

“There you are.”

_who just found me on my secret hideout._

“Hey,” I say, following him with my eyes as he leans back against the opposite side of the doorframe, copying my posture and facing me. His body is divided on two sides: one covered by the darkness of the hallway, one illuminated by the moon and the lamps outside.

“You okay?” he asks. (At least he’s going straight to the point.)

“Yeah.” My gaze falls to the floor.

“How’s everyone doing?” I wonder. “Nothing crazy going on?”

“Well…” he starts, “Sokka took a swing against Jet. Jet skipped it and for the force of his own hit Sokka fell on the snack stand against a cream cake. Jet laughed. Suki pulled him into a headlock. He stopped laughing. Suki decided to call out the crowd’s attention by claiming it was a demonstration of an original martial art from the Earth Kingdom colonies with Jet as the dummy. A really big group gathered around them as she continued to narrate the blows and blockages she was applying, which apparently had names like ‘You player’, ‘Never cheat on my friend’ and ‘Only _I_ can laugh at my boyfriend.’”

“ _Awwwww!_ ” I coo, “Really?”

He nods.

“Remember me to cook Suki’s favorite meals for the rest of the week.”

We fall back into silence for a brief moment. A brief, very charged moment with questions I would rather leave unanswered.

“I was worried when you ran off,” Zuko admits. The short distance between us suddenly seem like kilometers. “I know I’m really not good at these… kind of things, but I…”

“Zuko. Relax.” I save him from going on further. “It’s not that much of a big deal.”

“It is a big deal for you,” he debates, “He hurt you.”

I shrug. “That’s what boys do.”

“That’s not true.” He intends to approach me, but reconsiders and reels back. “I mean… not all boys do that.”

The silence turns even more charged when the words leave his mouth. The night turns colder and darker. It feels like everything around us is projecting this tight, uncomfortable feeling building inside me.

“Zuko…”

“I wish you broke up with Jet.”

“I think it’s fair to say we have are already broken up.”

“Good, because you deserve better.” He isn’t looking at me as he speaks, but to the floor instead, embarrassed and sincere in equal parts. “It doesn’t have to be… me, but you deserve better.”

“Zuko…”

“You don’t have to say anything, Katara, it’s okay.” He do raises his eyes to meet mine then, even the one that’s covered by the darkness in the hall glows as they return my gaze. His pale skin glows, too. All of him glows, always, like the flame that he is. “I just want you to be happy… even if your happiness doesn’t include me, I just want you to be happy.”

The night doesn’t feel cold and dark anymore, it feels empty and dry, like I should do something to fix it. But I’m glued to my spot, incapable to move, incapable to look away from Zuko.

We’re no longer separated by kilometers, we are separated by inches, only enough for us to keep our respective air. The intense gold, amber and yellow of his eyes resemble the sun. Combining with the moonlight tonight and blinding me, I feel like I could burn if I touched him.

Like I could break if I didn’t.

“I shouldn’t have interrupted when you wanted to be left alone,” he says. “Come back when you’re ready. We will wait for you.”

He gives a step to leave. I don’t let him.

Before I can stop to think twice – or even fully understand what I am doing – I push him back against the frame, and kiss him. (It’s surprisingly gentler compared to the rush with which I pinned him to the wall.)

When I taste surprise more than any other thing in him, my foggy mind clears a bit, and I pull back. Shivering. “Sorry.”


	5. “I wish I could have just loved you from the beginning.”

**Zuko**

Sometimes it’s still difficult to remember my past. The memory of myself reflected on the mirror the first years after my banishment seems foreign, as though the one staring back wasn’t really me.

It truly wasn’t me.

It was _never_ me.

My factions were different back then, hardened by a too hard of a permanent scowl. My scar looked gorier as a consequence.

“What are you thinking about?”

I startle and turn to Katara’s voice. “You were touching your scar,” she explains, pointing to her own left eye.

“Oh,” I mutter. I lower my hand from my face. “Sorry. I was reminiscing.”

“About what?” Katara props her chin on her palm in an interrogating pose, her blue eyes are wide and sparkling with curiosity.

“I was thinking about my banishment,” I say, a little ashamed to keep bringing it up.

“You want to talk about it some more? You seem to be doing better since we started talking about it more often.”

“There’s not much left to talk about,” I confess, “I feel like I let my whole life be affected by just _one_ incident.”

“It wasn’t an ‘incident’, Zuko,” Katara emphasizes, but her voice is kind. “It hurt you.”

“Many things have hurt me.” _Some of them referring to my father, some of them not._ “They didn’t affect me as much as that.”

“Don’t rest importance to the way you feel.”

“I don’t,” I clarify, “But it angers me that it took me so long for realizing what I was doing. What was wrong and what was right. Who I was meant to be.”

“It doesn’t matters anymore is how long it took you to realize it.” Her hand reaches for mine and lands softly on the back of it. “You’re here now. You’re with us. That’s what matters.”

I stare at our hands together for a few seconds. There’s a light tickling on my knuckles against her palm and her fingers against my skin.

I raise my gaze to meet Katara’s eyes.

“I wish could have loved you from the beginning.”

_I wish I had never been banished, I wish I could have been a different person when I met you._


	6. “I’d do anything for you.”

**Katara**

Waiting for Sozin’s Comet is dreadful. Or maybe it’s just me the one who is over-worrying – worrying about everyone that insist they can take care of themselves. (Yeah, sounds like me!)

I think I should talk to Sokka before we departure for the battle, but I don’t know what is it that I’m supposed to say to him. I’m not thinking about saying goodbye. It _can’t_ be a goodbye, I can’t – I _won’t_ lose my brother.

I wish Dad was here, I wish I knew where he is at all.

At the same time, I don’t want him here. I want him as far away from this as possible. I want him back on the Tribe, where he’s safe and at home and we will meet him there soon, and we will be together, and…

“You’re anxious,” Zuko points out.

I turn to him sitting beside me. “How can you tell?”

He shrugs. “For the way you’ve been frowning in silence. I have some experience in that.”

I laugh, because I know he isn’t even joking.

“I see.” I put a strand of my hair behind my ear. “I was thinking about the day we’ve got ahead.”

“Yeah, me too.”

We both look up at the clear blue sky. For what I’ve heard, it’ll be tinted burning red soon.

My gaze glides down and settles on Zuko’s profile. I stare at him as he stares at the sky.

“I’m glad that you could solve things out with your uncle,” I say.

He smiles. “I’m glad too. That he decided to forgive me so quickly and by himself is proof of how much of a great man he is.”

“You’re a great man too, Zuko,” I assure. “A great _young_ man, but still; you and your uncle are very alike.”

I can see his eyes sparkling like fireworks when he turns to me, “You think so?”

“Yes,” I nod.

We stare at each other’s eyes for a while, it’s hard to tell how long. Today it seems like time does not passes. Everything is frozen on a pacific, sleepy state, up until the sky burns (for real) and everything changes forever.

“You sure you want to come with me to face Azula?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t want to ask you to do anything you don’t want to do. Especially today.”

“I want to do this, Zuko. I want to go with you.”

“Thanks.”

“Don’t thank me.”

Zuko’s eyes are colored strangely. They are the most amber in the middle and it spreads outwards, mixing with their more noticeable golden color. I wouldn’t be able to notice if we weren’t this close.

“I’d do anything for you,” I say.

The more he approaches me, the more I can take notice of his eye color. They are not completely golden either, they are a bright yellow so blurry that it appears like gold.

I close my eyes.


	7. “I don’t regret one single moment, not one. It led me to you.”

**Zuko**

It’s a moved day the one of my coronation. I can’t help but feel I should be acting different, feeling different. Happier. I’m still too new at this happiness thing – having friends to celebrate with me and all – but I expected the emotions to come more intensely. Instead, I just feel a serene satisfaction.

It’s astonishingly pleasant, but it’s not exactly what I was aiming to feel.

Maybe I’m not able to feel that kind of happiness. Maybe…

“What are you doing here?” Katara approaches me from inside my uncle’s Jasmine Dragon. The sight of her dark skin contrasted with her green dress under the light of the sunset blinds me; it’s too bright, too pretty. “Shouldn’t you be joining the party?”

“Um…” I scratch the back of my head. “Parties are not really my kind of place.”

“But it’s _your_ coronation day.” Katara reaches for my arm, hooks it with her own to pull me back inside.

Her arm feels slender up to the point of skinny. A sudden, unwelcome nausea arises in me when I think of all the months she spent malnourished and on the run. It goes beyond empathy, I feel physically sick imagining Katara going through something like that.

“We are celebrating _you_ ,” she insists.

I look inside again, everybody is laughing animatedly and even from here I can see that the atmosphere in the tea shop is delightful. It’s everything my uncle wanted it to be.

It makes me restraint myself.

I am fearful, of never being able to feel that kind of happiness myself. Of never belonging like that. “Um…”

“Something wrong?” Katara’s expression turns into one of curious concern. Her eyes are colored sapphire blue under the sunset.

“No, no, I just… Ugh!” I smack my own forehead. “I don’t know what’s going on.”

“Try explaining it.” She lets go of my arm.

We both turn away from the entrance, looking at Ba Sing Se’s Middle Ring from the balcony. The city is painted in red, yellow, orange and some bluish and purplish tones for the dusk; it’s beautiful. And a little melancholic. It makes me think of the time I spent in here that I didn’t know how to appreciate.

“I’ve been thinking too much about the past these days,” I confess, abruptly breaking the quiet ambiance. “Since we finally won the war, I have been feeling strange. Or not feeling at all. It’s like I couldn’t muster emotions anymore.”

“You think it’s because of your father and sister?”

“No, no.” (That mere thought seems ridiculous now.) “It’s me. I think I spent too much time brooding and yelling that I no longer know how to change from that.”

“That’s not your fault, Zuko.” Katara’s hand softly settles on my forearm, stroking it. “Well… I mean… maybe it is. A little. But that’s okay. We can help you change that.”

It doesn’t sounds very convincing.

“We will get through this together, Zuko,” she continues, pushing strength into her words. “We already survived the war together, we will face whatever comes next together.”

Her hand squeezes my forearm lightly, not enough for it to be painful, but enough to anchor the two of us together.

Katara chains herself to the optimism and hope that continue to live on even after everything we’ve been through, and chains me to them through her persona, so I won’t fall into the darkness again.

I’m surprised by the small smile pulling at my lips. I take Katara’s hand and bright it close to my mouth. My lips graze over her knuckles. Her skin is soft.

“Even with everything that happened to me,” I say, holding her hands in both on my own, “my banishment and my family, I don’t regret one single moment, not one. It led me to you.”


	8. “I’m sorry again.” “What do you mean?” “For the way I was, the way I used to treat you.” “Come on, we both hated each other. I should be apologizing as much as you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got an emergency yesterday and couldn't post. Sorry.

**Zuko**

“I’m sorry again.”

Katara rolls over to her side to face me, propping her hand on the bed’s mattress; the latter shifts under her weight. Her dark skin and dark, wavy hair splayed on the bedsheets contrast against their ruby red color, it’s mesmerizing. It makes her eyes shine bluer. “What do you mean?”

“For the way I was,” I explain, whispering. Looking down. “The way I used to treat you.”

She shakes her hand on a dismissive gesture. “Come on, we both hated each other. I should be apologizing as much as you.”

“Then start apologizing.”

“What?”

“You just said you should be apologizing just as much.”

“I ain’t apologizing for a thing.” Her expression turns into an attempt of a dignifying one which, on her, it looks more adorable than any other thing. I smile. “You were a jerk.”

I smile wider. “True.”


	9. “Look at me. I love you.”

**Katara**

“Zuko! Zuko, wake up!”

He’s crying, and I can’t do anything to stop it but I refuse to acknowledge that, I keep trying to reach out to him even in his nightmare, I try to push myself – my voice – into his thoughts too far gone into a darkness that has nothing to do with the night; I know I can. I have to. I can save him from this too, I can save him. I _want_ to save him.

_I have to._

“Mom… Azula… Don’t leave me…” His murmurs are strangely soft as his body twists violently, and shudders, and sweats. “Uncle… Don’t leave me. Please! Don’t leave me!”

I shake him further. “Zuko!”

“Don’t go now! Please! I’m sorry! _I’m sorry!_ ”

His cries become higher in volume and force. His body keeps twisting as if he was fighting someone, or something.

“No. _No!_ Katara, please don’t go! Katara! Please! _Please!_ ”

“ _Zuko!_ ”

He wakes up with a start, swinging his arm like he was about to punch someone, I observe him recover his breathe.

My hand tickles with the urge to touch him, but I don’t want to disrupt until he’s ready. Perhaps he could react badly to the contact. It has happened before.

“Zuko?”

“I’m sorry.” He does not look at me when he answers. His eyes are focused now, but it looks like a part of him is still in the nightmare.

He blinks for awakening to the fullest. “Sorry. Was I screaming again?”

I murmur a timid “yes”. It’s painful. For both him and me.

“What was the nightmare about this time?”

“It was that… I had burned an entire town. And I was chained as a punishment. And you… everybody… were mad at me. Because of what I have done.”

“Zuko.”

“I didn’t…”

“Zuko, look at me.” I hold his jaw with both of my hands, just hardly enough to call his attention. His eyes encounter mine easily. “I love you, I’m not going anywhere. Never.”


	10. “You want to kiss me, don’t you?” “I always want to kiss you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had some difficult days trying to get ahold of a few personal troubles of my own and subsequent sleep troubles that left me a bit uninspired to write. I'll try to fix that in the coming days, sorry for taking so long for updating.

**Zuko**

“So then you’re going to use Azula’s dispersion against her?”

“I don’t think it will require much of me using it against her. Her energy is too destructive, and directed in too many directions, including her own.”

“How can you tell?”

“I just know,” I say, “but Azula’s energy is innately destructive anyways.”

Katara bites her bottom lip and looks down. She’s stressed, even when she tries to appear relaxed leaning carelessly against the wall.

“You okay?” I ask.

“No,” she answers sincerely. Her gaze returns up to me. “You said you don’t want anybody else to get hurt, what about if _you_ get hurt?”

“I’ll be alright.”

“How can you tell that too?”

“I know you’ll be there if something happens to me.”

It is just now that I realize how close we are standing to each other; me, facing Katara with her back pressed against the wall. My shadow makes her eyes shine like they do in the dimness. They stare intently into my own.

“You want to kiss me, don’t you?”

I answer in a beat. “I always want to kiss you.”

I don’t even notice who moves first, but now Katara clings to my waist while I softly cup her face in both of my hands. Her mouth is hot, her entire skin is hot, warmer than usual. If it is because of my proximity or for the adrenaline of the upcoming battle, I can’t tell.

I kiss her tenderly. I want to build and keep this memory of us, I want to have this moment before I go to face my sister, my enemy. Katara’s name repeats itself in my mind and the sensation of her skin against my own imprints itself on my palms, on my lips. Even if this can’t last – if _I_ won’t last – I want to live this, to feel Katara and breathe her. This could be my last chance to express this love that I feel for her, I’ve got to make it count.


	11. “Tell me what you want to hear."

**Zuko**

Katara continues to treat my injuries from our fight with those scavengers terrorizing the town.

“You were lucky,” she observes, somewhere between amazed and worried. “It’s only a flesh wound.”

“It doesn’t feels like a wound at all.” Thank Spirits I have high pain tolerance.

The coldness of her water against my stomach’s bare skin is close to make me shiver, but I can still feel the heat from her hands even through the thick fabric and leather of her gloves.

“Don’t joke about this, Zuko,” she reprimands quietly, “I was very worried when they shot you that blast of fire.”

“You shouldn’t be,” I say. I hiss a little when the water contacts the traces of exposed flesh. “It’s not the first time someone tries to attack me from behind.” I hiss again. “Only that that time I had my uncle to have my back.”

“When was that?”

“I had an Agni Kai with Zhao not too long after I first met you, Sokka and Aang. I won but I refused to end him, so he tried to shot me when I turned. Uncle deviated the attack for me.”

“Why did you never told us about that?” Katara’s question is similar to a surprised gasp.

“Never thought much of it, aside from what my uncle said that I was more honorable than Zhao at the time.” I hesitate. “Though, to be honest, I don’t really think much of anything that has to do with _Zhao_.”

“That sounds reasonable,” she agrees. “But now that you mention it, what was it that happened between you and Zhao? Why does he hates you so much?”

“He never thought I was worthy of the royal family,” I explain. “Since my father started treating me dismissively, Zhao copied his attitude towards me. I think a small part of him wanted to be part of the royal family and that’s why he was so obsessed with me.”

“It sounds like he had a complex,” Katara deadpans.

I laugh, and hiss some more at the sting of the burn. “Yes, I think so too.”

“Stop moving,” she advises, “It will only cause unnecessary pain while I heal you.”

“Sorry.” I throw my head back against the mattress of my Ember Island bed.

“I’m the one that should be saying sorry,” Katara says, sad. “Even if I close the open wounds and restore the internal damage, I can’t restore the burned skin.”

“Don’t worry about that.”

“I wish I could have done something right after they shot you. When Aang burned me and I healed myself the first time, it didn’t leave any marks because I put my hands in the water right after the burn.”

“When did that happen?”

“A while before we got to the North Pole, when he first tried firebending. Curiously, we also encountered Zhao that day. I think he just brought bad luck.”

I laugh again. “Maybe.”

“Don’t you think it is weird that we are barely talking about this now?” Katara continues focusing on my injury. I can feel the skin closing and become less sensitive to the touch, meanwhile I stare at her face illuminated by the glowing water.

“What do you mean?”

“About things that happened to us before. It feels like we have been keeping them a secret.”

“You think?”

“I mean… how much do we really know about each other?”

“Well, you know that I am from the Fire Nation and that I worked as waiter at the Earth Kingdom,” I say. “Most of the people that I know only know one of the two.”

“True, but… what else?”

“You also know how why Zhao hates me and how I got my scar. Not many people know about that either, not even in the Fire Nation.”

“But what else? I feel like we barely even know anything about each other,” her face falls. “Okay, done. I think it’s enough healing.”

Effectively, I don’t feel stinging or pain anymore, and even though my abdomen is colored with a large reddish spot that extends from below my rips to above my hipbone, the skin is closed and smooth. I run my hand over it, testing it.

Then I incorporate and sit with my back against the header of the bed. “Tell me what you want to hear.”

Her blue eyes scan my still exposed core, remaining for moment too long on the spot that she just healed. Her hand follows in tow, reaching out and running her fingers from the center of my chest to my abs. “What happened that you’re not so muscular anymore?” she wonders. “You used to be more broad-chested when you went to the South Pole.”

“My uncle and I went through some hard times at the Earth Kingdom.”

It’s hard to talk being so highly aware of Katara’s mere fingertips against my skin; I stare straight at her eyes staring into mine to have something to concentrate on.

“When we first got there after renouncing to the Fire Nation, we had to ask for money and food on the streets. We weren’t all that lucky, I guess I don’t have the ability to inspire much pity in others.”

“You don’t need anyone’s pity, Zuko.”

I shrug. “It doesn’t matter. Even when we finally got to Ba Sing Se, the Lower Ring is not exactly a paradise, it’s difficult to get quality food; my time there made me appreciate more the Earth citizens. Besides, I spent some time really sick and I couldn’t eat, only drink water.”

“That’s awful!”

I shrug again. “It was fever, the heat was affecting me too much.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that. If I had been there, I could have helped you.”

“It wasn’t so bad. I think that fever was one of the best things that happened to me, when I recovered, I could see things more clearly. I think it was the first step that brought me closer to you.”


	12. Poetry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not technically a prompt. The past days I've been very busy and I haven't have time to update, besides I was feeling down and uninspired because of the anti discourse on social media. I wanted to get back at the haters and make me feel better in the process by posting something, but my fanart is not ready yet and I'm still too mentally drained to write a long chapter, so I decided to write a poem instead. Enjoy!

_**Me and you** _

Cold gold and burning fire, 

The sight of soulful eyes, 

The memory of a dark past. 

Look at me, 

Notice me here,

Feel my closeness, my approach. 

Warmth and ice,

Flesh and wounds, 

Allow me to look at you, 

Permit my tact, your skin against mine. 

For now, at this time, 

I just seek to hear and feel,

The echo of our breaths,

Your heat,

My calm and despair. 


	13. Poetry II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so here's a little secret. Last night's poems was actually something I improvised out of frustration because I didn't get the chance to post the poem I do had the intention of posting *giggles* It was the heat of the moment, and I REALLY wanted to get back at antis, so...
> 
> Anyways, here's the poem I thought through yesterday. I thought it would be nice if yesterday's poem was from Katara's perspective and today's from Zuko's.

**_ Every night _ **

Were my feelings flimsier, I would tell the moon about you;

Was my voice less raw, was my breath less choked.

Yet I’m quiet,

But not unfeeling,

Your sight and thought,

The words become inexistent.

Were my feelings weaker, I would talk about you to the night,

Forever, endlessly,

I would light it up with your history and might.

Voiceless as I am, I wish for you to the stars,

I wish for the strength to confront my heart.

So filled with fear and pain,

A beat for you, in honor to you.

Were my feelings lighter, clearer,

I could tolerate the ache.

I could talk.

I could touch.

Without fearing unworthiness,

Without dread of your light against my dark.

But my emotions for you,

Too clouding, too eclipsing,

Overwhelming, they break me.

Tonight, every night,

I’ll look for the moonbeam to heal me.

To illuminate past me.

Into my soul, my voice and thoughts,

For her to see you.

For her to feel you.


	14. Author's Note

**_ Author’s Note _ **

**Hey, everyone!**

**I know I haven’t updated this fic in quite a while, but either way I wanted to thank you for your support on it.**

**I just came to tell you my life hasn’t been easy recently and that’s why I’ve spent so much time away, and maybe it doesn’t help that I’m overloading myself with writing and art projects.**

**Lately, I’ve been having some more than stressful days; I’ve been repeatedly bullied on social media for a number of topics, form country’s (Venezuela’s) situation, to my family’s personal situation, to my favorite book authors. (It makes no sense; I know.) The BLM movement is somewhat triggering for me because the same people that bully me for being Latina claim themselves “anti-racists”, and granted, maybe they are _not_ racist; they are just xenophobes. I just can’t stop seeing the hypocrisy and I don’t want to relate such horrible thoughts to such a noble cause. **

**All of that combined with my sleeping troubles gives me some awful migraines that certainly don’t get better if I keep pushing myself to work – (even if it is for writing and drawing, two of the things I love to do the most.)**

**What I’m trying to say is that I wanted to keep coming up with new chapters and new stories for keep bringing some joy even during the bad times… and also for trying to reach Cassandra Clare’s level of writing two books at a time.**

**But I guess I just can’t be Cassie Clare.**

**I realize now that I need to give myself some more space and treat myself kinder so, I’m going to use a little of that space for organizing my thoughts and then come back with more chapters. Just… when I’m ready.**

**I need some time to finish certain things and schedule new projects. Maybe with a new, more ordered agenda, I’ll find time to come up with new fanarts inspired on my current fics.**

**I’m not going to think much of it now, I just came to tell you that I’m glad you have enjoyed the fic so far, and that I hope you’ll keep enjoying it when I come back again. Thanks again for your support, it means the world to me!!**

**Bye!!**

**Hugs and kisses!!**


	15. Bashful & Passionate kiss/Kiss on the nape

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter inspired by Charlie St. Cloud, the movie, and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Have you guys ever watched those movies? Benjamin's okay, but Charlie's didn't make justice to the book.

**Zuko**

What’s _the point_ in insisting to have a homemade dinner – _no servants allowed_ – if then your so-called friends (who _dragged_ you to come in the first place) are not going to help you clean up the table? (And to think I came all the way to Ember Island for this!)

“I think they ate too much turtle-duck fillets,” Katara says, helping me pick up the dishes. “Sokka always gets sleepy when he eats too much turtle-duck fillet.”

 _That’s_ Sokka’s _excuse._ “And what about Aang?” I wonder, not hiding my annoyance. “Isn’t he a vegetarian?”

“He is, but he just goes to sleep early. Ever since he got nightmares before the Invasion, he’s been trying to keep a healthier sleeping schedule.”

“Huh.”

“And Toph is just normally lazy,” she concludes once we step into the kitchen.

I must admit our Ember Island house – _our_ Ember Island house; Aang, Sokka, Toph, Suki, Katara and mine – turned out really okay after I order it remodel. The kitchen was reconstructed a bit smaller for it to appear homier, but the lightning is peace-inducing. Bright, but dull enough to not be overpowering. Especially at this time of the night.

“If Suki was here, she would help us out,” Katara observes. It’s not necessary for her to touch the dirty plates piled up in the dishwasher, the water twirls and polishes them following the directions of her waving hand.

“I did invite her,” I reminisce, “but she said the Kyoshi Warriors had an important mission in the Earth Kingdom frontiers.”

Katara’s eyebrow arches as she eyes me curiously. “It’s strange that they get to work so far away from the capital when they are kind of your bodyguards, don’t you think?”

“They are an independent force,” I pass my fingers over the walls, thinking. And testing the recently applied paint. “They get to go where they are solicited, I only hire them whenever the situation demands it.”

Katara smirks; somewhat playfully, proudly, and knowingly at the same time. “You know, it’s really nice you have so much respect for a group of female warriors.”

I’m puzzled, “Who wouldn’t?”

“Sokka,” she answers in a beat. “You should have been there when we first got to Kyoshi Island. Suki and the Warriors ambushed us out of the freaking blue. Sokka spent the rest of the day pouting ‘cause a group of girls beat him and then went to the temple while they were training just to say he was a better warrior than them.”

My eyes widen. “And what happened then?”

“Suki beat him in his own game and tied one of his shirtsleeves to his ankle. He came back jumping in one feet and crying – I mean, ‘crying’ in the way it was just _obvious_ he was trying not to.”

Both of my hands fly to cover my mouth. (Just because I’m still not much used to laughing.) “Really?”

“Mm-hmmm,” Katara nods slowly; her grin is slightly more pleased than what it should be. “He deserved it, he was a real jerk back then.”

“Maybe I should I have let Suki to beat me up when we first met, too,” I muse while I lean against the counter. “I was a real jerk back then as well.”

“You need to stop thinking about that time.” One of Katara’s hands reaches and combs back the hair falling on my forehead.

My eyes close.

“It’s not healthy,” she concludes.

“I know,” I agree. Inwardly, allowing disappointment to settle at the briefness of her caress.

“You look handsome in the casual clothes.”

The disappointment is shoved away by utter shock, and I almost yelp at the abruptness of it. My face feels hot. “I – um – ”

Katara laughs.

Then playfully pokes at my side with her finger. “You need to relax some more, _Your Fireiness_. You look like an elementary school kid with a crush.”

 _What a_ fitting _comparison, Katara._ Of course _it doesn’t worsen my blushing._

“I do not,” I say.

“Yes, you do; and I have experience watching over kids.”

“Don’t compare me with a kid.”

“Right, right, _Oh Incredibly Mature Fire Lord_. You just turned eighteen, Zuko; it never hurts to act your own age once in a while.”

And Little Miss _Motherly_ has spoken _._ (I would like to point that out to her, but I’m not crazy enough to do so while we are still near to a _water_ source.)

All this talk about coming of age makes me remember Katara’s sixteenth birthday four months ago. It’s hard to believe she has… um… _developed_ so much in such short time. I mean, she’s even curvier now, which is even further noticeable with the dress she’s wearing; the top exposes all of her plain stomach from the end of her ribcage, and the skirt hugs her wide hips…

I whip my eyes away. (Maybe I _should_ let her spatter me with some cool water.) (It certainly seems like I need it.)

“Oh, hey,” Katara brightens, “have I told you about how the Southerner Expansion Project is doing? I’m going to do hella lots of travelling as the new ambassador!”

“If somebody can convince people to invest in Southern Water Tribe goods is you.”

She giggles. “Thanks! I can’t wait till we finally start this project, we’ve been preparing ourselves since forever! Imagine when the Southern Water Tribe goes back to be a commercial influence! It’ll be _the greatest_ , Zuko! Hey, there’s an atlas here in your studio, right? C’mon, I want to show you all the places I’ll be visiting!”

The water splashes loudly over the plates once she drops it, takes my hand, and I almost stumble forward when she yanks me to follow through the hallways.

She confidently opens the studio’s door by herself – (it’s another one of the rooms I had reconstructed; it used to be a spare room.) (I ordered it expanded along with turning _my father’s_ old studio into a spare room.)

“Have I already told you I _love_ what you did with this place?” Her blue eyes wander enthusiastically over the dimly illuminated room. Like the kitchen.

“Technically, it wasn’t _me_ the one that did it, I…”

“Zuko, just take the compliment.”

“Sorry.”

“Where are the atlases again?”

I point to one of the upper shelves.

Katara lets go of my hand and all but taps reaching for them.

I close the door behind me; the room becomes the slightest darker.

“You need some help?”

I come closer as she bounces trying to reach the highest shelf.

“Nope, I’m good.” Jump.

“You sure about that?”

Jump. “Yes.”

 _And she says_ I’m _the stubborn one._

I take the maps down in one stretch of my arm. Hand them to her.

She takes them with a somewhat childish, somewhat of a pout. “I was about to get to them.”

_Of course you were._

She unrolls them all over the cedar wood desk. The oil lamps illume her face, it seems like all of her skin was made of solid gold; not her eyes though, they are _always_ blue no matter the time or the light against them. But not static blue like gemstones, alive blue like the sea. 

Her necklace’s pendant shines too, it drives my eyes to her shapely clavicle.

Her hand comes up to it. 

“You think I should try to not wear Water Tribe regalia when I go visit the other provinces?” she asks. “I want to show them I’m respectful of their culture for them to respect mine, but…”

“That’s more a matter of personal beliefs,” I say, staring at her unsure face. Her eyes glow now with anticipation, but also mild worry. “You know I’ve worked for the Fire Nation to be more respectful of other cultures as well, that’s why I’ve encouraged the people to don’t mind visitors wearing clothes from different countries.”

My hand unconsciously reaches for her pendant as well, my knuckles brush against her bare skin as I hold it between my fingers. “Not all world leaders think that way, though. So I think you should just research the kind of people you’re dealing with, but present yourself as what you are: a proud Southerner. It’s the _Southerner_ Expansion Project for a reason.”

The corners of her mouth go up.

“Thanks, Zuko. You’re the best political advisor _ever_.”

I smile. “Thanks.”

Realization washes over me, and I withdraw my hand.

“By the way, do you mind helping me tighten the collar?” Katara turns around as soon as the question leaves her mouth, already brushing her hair over her shoulder, exposing her nape.

I gulp. “Sure.”

It’s quite pathetic how shaky my fingers are; it’s just helping her with her collar, for Spirits sake! I look like a moron moving raccoon-turtle-like slowly for hiding my trembling.

Maybe Katara won’t notice it; she looks fairly engrossed on the maps across the table.

“Check it, I’m going to visit Gaoling again,” she points to it at the atlas. “But then I’m going to Weizhou.” Point again. “And then I’m going Chongming.” Point. “And then to Hengsha.”

She’s too absorbed, right? She won’t notice if my hands linger on her shoulders just little longer than necessary, right? She won’t notice if I come too close just for a moment… Right?

As unconsciously as with her necklace, my fingers draw the line of her shoulder.

Standing behind her, I’m covered in the shadows, staring at the golden halo the lamps create around her silhouette.

Like _all_ of her was made of solid gold.

She won’t notice if I only stay like this for a little while longer, right? It’s just… for a moment…

**Katara**

Yes, I’m aware Zuko’s eyes (and hands) on me; I’m not _dense_! I have to contain shivers from his hot hands on my shoulders.

 _He_ is dense, or else he would have just made a move already!

Honestly, I wasn’t thinking about trying anything when I dragged him here – (yes, for real) – I guess the atmosphere just grew in that direction.

But it’s becoming unbearable, Zuko’s eyes stare holes into my neck and the side of my face; I feel the skin there heating. The more aware I become of his hard chest against my back, the more I have to fight the tiny hairs on my arms from standing up, and it gets tougher the more his breath comes closer to the curve of my neck.

Slowly.

_Closer… and closer…_

I can _feel_ his gaze roaming over my bare shoulders just as with his touch. 

I’m trembling, my voice waves.

“And… I’m also going here,” I point to another place at the map. An intense shiver shakes me when Zuko’s lips graze against my skin. “And… here…” It’s just the faintest of the brushes, his lips a mere millimeter away from my neck.

I can’t.

It’s a blur when I whip around, I become wind, and then human again when my lips find his. He receives them eagerly, his skin is hotter than usual. His mouth. His jaw. He tastes salty, like the ocean, and smells like sunshine and beach air. I pull him closer to me; impossibly closer, as though we were one person. As if our ribcages were fusing to share one heart.

I’m dizzy inhaling his breath, feeling his weight almost crushing me. The air inside the room is heavy, and dense, like steam.

_Steam…_

Zuko’s skin nearly burns my fingers where I’m holding his jaw, his mouth is somehow scorching, and soft, and wet. His heart beats against my chest, mine resounds in my own ears, and everything – us, this moment, this place – it feels… alive.

So alive its soul is set on fire.

 _I want this to last_ , I think.

I want to picture how we look at this moment together.


	16. Height difference kiss

**Katara**

“How did you say that Fire Nation royal dance went?”

I know it was a slow dance, but I can’t remember the actual steps.

Zuko doesn’t seem so eager to repeat it. “Do you really have to ask that?”

“I like dancing,” I say simply… and a little amused at his expression.

“I don’t,” he deadpans.

“Didn’t you say your parents put you and Azula into ballroom dance lessons when you were kids?”

“I didn’t say I _enjoyed_ them.”

I have to repress a giggle.

“It’s just one dance,” I plea instead. “What’s the harm in it?”

Zuko sighs and rolls his eyes to the sky, like he was asking Heavens _why me?_

“Fine.” His voice is flat and unenthusiastic as you get, but whatever. I still beam.

He takes my hand for me to come close, and once I’m placed in front of him, he proceeds to explain:

“It goes like this. You and your partner stand side by side taking hands.” (We do.) “And then you turn around and change sides.” (We do.) “Then he pulls for you to spin towards him like this.” He pulls at my arm and I twirl, landing with my back against his chest, his arm still wrapped around me. “And then he lets go of you.” He raises our hands for me to spin out of the curl I was into.

He continues explaining as we keep moving around, it mostly consists in us circling around each other, me dancing some more by myself in front of Zuko’s attentive gaze, and more spinning until finally landing with our chests against each other, our hands entwined. I look up into Zuko’s golden eyes.

“And that’s it.”

For all his talking that he doesn’t like dancing he doesn’t look displeased _at all_.

“Thanks, Zuko!” I smile. “You know, you’re not all that much of a bad dancer.”

“Don’t tell anyone you actually got me to dance.”

Now I do giggle.

Then hesitate.

Push myself up on the tip of my toes and kiss him.


	17. “I am here. I am with you.”

**Zuko**

I dream with darkness, yet not cold darkness; hot, dry darkness. It’s more like nothingness.

Darkness and nothingness are not the same thing, darkness is heavy and tangible, nothingness is frustratingly flimsy. There’s nothing to feel, it’s just you slowly disintegrating like sand into thin air, you become... nothing.

A shell.

You’re empty.

It’s getting hotter. Flames appear.

They are too red, they don’t have enough oxygen.

I can’t breathe.

The flames grow to reveal a giant shadow, surrounded by extravagant red and yellow and gold – it doesn’t takes a genius to figure out who it is.

He can’t touch me, he can’t; but he’s still there in front of me. Laughing. Plotting. Mirroring me.

I’m not like him. I don’t want to be.

I’m not _him_.

_Don’t look at me. Don’t talk to me._

_Don’t look like me! Don’t talk like me!_

The flames grow bigger, brighter. I’m choking.

I can’t create fire by myself. I can’t extinguish the flames. My eyes sting with hot tears. _I can’t… I can’t…_

He laughs. Endlessly, cruelly. He’s too close, I can _hear_ him too close. Too vivid. Too real.

I wake up with a violent gasp, the curtains wave with the cool breeze coming through the bedroom’s window.

Half unconsciously – half because I do want to confirm this is reality, half because I just want to get rid of this… feeling – my hand squeezes the red silk sheets. I guess at least I wasn’t screaming in my nightmares this time, Katara is still sound asleep next to me.

But perhaps I talked too fast; her arm comes around my waist.

“It’s alright.” Her whisper breaks through the dimness. (This _is_ reality.) “I am here. I am with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised on Tumblr that I would update the new chapters for this during what was left of the week. Sadly, I'm a little shorter on time than what I planned for today so, I'm going to leave it up till here and come back with the rest tomorrow! ;-)


	18. Kiss on the hand & Palm Kiss

**Katara**

The day of Zuko’s coronation is… strange. Just a few days ago we were trying to escape from a real inferno unleashed here on Earth, and now? The sky is clear blue, and the sun shines peacefully. The ruins from the consumed buildings remain, it’s the only thing that tells us it wasn’t a dream all along.

It’s already a new world. No Firelord. No Fire Princess. No _war_.

The fire, the darkness, it all _stopped_. Reset and begun anew.

It’s… terrifying.

_Who are this new persons that we are now?_

_Do they belong in this new world, too?_

“What are you thinking about?”

I turn to Zuko slowly. We’re both standing in front of one of the Fire Palace’s windows, observing at the arrangements being made for the big ceremony. It’s conflicting to see him in his royal attires but with his hair loose and disheveled as per usual. I can’t decide if I like the Fire Nation royal robes.

“Nothing,” I say, smiling softly. Absently.

“It doesn’t look like nothing.” 

“I’m okay, _Your Fireiness_ ,” I emphasize, and jokingly ruffle his hair some more. “And _you_ are supposed to be the center of attention today. It’s _your_ big day.”

“Don’t remind me of it,” he pushes my hand away, but not unkindly. “It feels weird.”

“How so?”

“I’m just not used to be… ‘the center of attention’, as you put it.”

“Didn’t you use to be the Fire _Prince_?”

“That’s different.”

I arch an eyebrow.

He sighs. “Look, even being the prince didn’t mean I was well-liked, especially when my father hated me and Azula was his favorite. Only an idiot would get on Firelord Ozai’s bad side by favoring his _least_ favorite child.”

My answer is an immediate hug, my arms tighten around his waist.

“ _I_ would have gotten on his bad side.”

“That’s because you’re very reckless.” Even with the sadness in it, his voice still reveals a small smile.

His arms come around me.

“You think I will be a good Firelord?” he wonders.

I take a step back to look him straight in the eye. “I think you will be the best Firelord.”

He isn’t convinced. “But I’m not very good at inspiring masses, am I?”

“You were able to inspire loyalty and friendship in Team Avatar,” I say, cupping his face with my hand.

He grins faintly.

“You’ll do fine, Zuko,” I assure with every inch of conviction I hold in my body. “You’ll. Do. _Amazing_. You’ll be the first Firelord of a whole new era. The Firelord that _started_ that new era. People are going to tell stories about you; everybody is going to love you.”

His faint grin is almost imperceptible, I wouldn’t be able to notice it if I wasn’t so close. Especially when he turns his head hiding his lips against my hand, pressing them against my palm.

He then takes my hand in his and puts it down. Closes it into a fist and brings my knuckles to his lips.

“Thank you, Katara.”


	19. “You’re more than what you think of yourself. You’re everything to me.”/Midnight kiss

**Katara**

Zuko has been quiet – quieter than normal – since dinner.

It’s my fault, I shouldn’t have brought that picture of his father to dinner and give place to that _awful_ conversation about who deserves to live and who doesn’t. (I should go look for Aang as well. Only Spirits know where he ran off to!)

But for the moment I just stare at Zuko as he just stares into the empty beach in the night. I wonder if he knows I’m here…

“How long are you going to stand there?”

And, just like that, I’m _shoved_ back to attention.

I blink. “I… uh… I was wondering if you were feeling alright.”

He shrugs without turning to me. “Yes. Fine.”

“Okay…”

Silence. _Awkward_ silence.

I know it’s a stupid way to push the conversation forward but… “You sure you’re alright? You seemed pretty affected back at dinner.”

Another shrug. “No, I wasn’t. I was just… It was nothing.”

“You want to talk about that?” I come closer.

“Not really.”

Now that I’m right next to him I get to see his impassive face. It’s serious, and blank, and absent. As cold as it gets, and that’s an odd way to describe Zuko. He might be a lot of things, but he isn’t cold. His jaw isn’t even angrily tensed, just squared, and his eyes are weirdly too focused, as if escaping. Following the line of his jaw, he has a certain resemblance to…

“You think I look like my father?”

Back to attention again.

“You thought he looked like me when you saw the picture,” he explains further.

I pout meditatively.

“No, not really,” I conclude.

“Really?” He glances at me through the corner of his eyes.

“Really,” I say. “I mean, maybe a little, but not enough. For all the statues that I’ve seen of Firelord Ozai, I would Azula is the one that inherited the most of him.” My eyes wander over the side of his face. “Do you look like your mom? Since Azula is the one that resembles your father and all…”

Yet another shrug. “I don’t know. People always say I’m the one that looks like my father, and that Azula inherited our mother’s beauty, but I guess it’s hard to tell who looks like who when one of us has the entire side of his face scarred.”

His hand comes to his left eye, the one covered in the shadows.

“Zuko…”

“It’s the truth anyways,” he says, matter-of-factly. “Azula would agree if she was here, and make some other bad joke about my scar.”

“She mocked your scar?” I’m _horrified_. (Not surprised, though.) (We’re talking about _Azula_ after all.)

“It’s okay,” he says. “Nothing I’m not used to.”

“Zuko…”

“What does it say about me that, even with everything, I don’t want my father to die?”

That… stuns me. My only movements are unconscious trembles, and even those seem in slow-motion.

“Probably that I’m an idiot, right?” Zuko answers his own question, with his shoulders hunched forward. Defeated.

“I think it means you know the value of a life,” I say.

“His life doesn’t have much value,” he replies, firmly. “But somehow… in some way… it still has to me.”

I hug him with all my might. Pressing my forehead against his back, I feel his heart beating against it.

Of all the things that are left to say in this moment, and tomorrow when we departure, and the day after when Firelord Ozai – Zuko’s father – is finally gone, and every day after that, the only thing I can muster is: “You’re not like your father, Zuko.”

He doesn’t answers.

“You’re more than what you think of yourself,” I say. “You’re everything to me.”

Time stops.

It’s static. Inert. Not cold or even dry, only… empty. Zuko’s heartbeat returns when he spins around and his lips get to mine, I can feel it resounding in all of my body; it fills me.

The rest of the island continues frozen, but we move, breathe, heat each other. The midnight moonbeam is like a purifying force, the aura that we share at this moment. Free, genuine. Illuminating the shadows circling around us. We can defeat those shadows, I know we can. Together.

That’s who we are; what we are meant to be.


	20. Blindfolded & ‘Melt into you’ kiss

**Zuko**

“Okay,” I say. “Ready.”

“You… You sure about this?”

I push the blindfold up to look at her. “Aang told me you used to help him with his blindfold training.”

“Well, yes,” Katara concedes. “But it wasn’t that easy. He didn’t exactly get a handle of it at the first try, you know?”

“And that’s why I’m trying to surpass him,” I declare. Place the covering back on top of my eyes. “Go ahead, don’t go easy on me.”

She still sounds unsure. “ _’Kay…_ If you say so.”

I hear the water flowing from the river into the direction her voice came from. It splatters and crashes like waves free in the ocean.

The dampness is palpable in the air.

I duck when she launches a water whip to my head. Skip another one directed at my shoulder.

Pirouette backwards when a water tentacle comes for my feet.

Katara keeps sending attacks my way and I keep dodging and missing them. Water is not exactly a silent weapon, (like I said, splattering and crashing), it makes it easier for me to just heighten my hearing – which is already pretty above average – and stay alert for when it comes my way.

I don’t know how long exactly do we continue with the training, but I know her attacks haven’t hit me not even once.

“And you said I couldn’t get a handle of it,” I gloat.

“Careful there, Mister Hot-Shot.”

Next thing I know, I fall right into the river.

“What the – ”

I don’t need to _see_ to tell Katara’s is laughing non-stop. I still rip the (wet) blindfold away, though.

“You were focusing on the attacks, but not on the _attacker_ , master firebender,” she explains, emphasizing the last part – and looking down at me from the river’s border. “It wasn’t difficult for me to sneak on you and push you.” 

“You could have just said so!”

Her eyes widen innocently. “And what’s the fun in that?”

I glare. She goes back to laughing.

“You’re lucky that I’m a gentleman,” I say, standing up and uselessly shaking the water off of me. “Or else I would push _you_ into the water.”

“Maybe this training is good for you to stop being such a bad loser,” the actual brat has the _audacity_ to smirk.

I glare at her once more.

But then I think it better. “You’re right. Could you at least help me get out of here, please?”

I extend my hand to her.

She takes it confidently – which makes it even easier to yank her into her own element.

“ _Ah!_ ” (She was right, this _is_ fun.)

“ _Ah!_ ” She half squeals, half screams in disbelief; her wet hair cascades over her eyes. She slaps it out of the way. “ _You said you were a gentleman!_ ”

I shrug. “I had a change of heart. It happens a lot to me.”

“Oh! Is that so?” She shapes the water into a wave to hit me.

Giving the environment that we are in, I can only use my hands to cover myself. (It’s not a very effective cover.)

“So we are playing _that_ game now, huh?” I say, passing a hand down my face for taking away the water excess.

I might not be a waterbender, but I still splash her face.

“You’re on,” Katara says.

(Okay, maybe it wasn’t the best idea to get into a water battle with a _waterbender_ … but _she’s_ the one that started it.)

We keep splattering each other like actual moronic little kids. I’m not sure how it all goes from trying to nearly drown each other to just laughing and half-heartedly pouring water into each other head, but it does. (This is how this kind of things normally turn out? I wouldn’t know.)

“Okay, okay, let’s call it even,” Katara agrees. “We could catch a cold if we stay here up to the night.”

“Don’t you know how rare it is for firebenders to catch _colds_?”

She smirks at me again. And then she kisses me.

It’s warm, and gentle, and beautiful, and my skin heats and my heart beats faster. The warmth spreads all over my body, melting me from the inside out.

Katara unglues our lips. _You’re beautiful_ , I think. “Let’s go, the others must be waiting for us.”


	21. Long distance

**Katara**

The airship is ready.

“You sure you don’t want to travel by sea?” Zuko’s questions has just the smallest trace of anxiety in it.

“We would love to, but Sokka and Dad want to get back to the Water Tribe as soon as possible, and since travelling by air is faster than travelling by sea…”

“Right,” he mutters.

The silence isn’t awkward, it’s just charged. It shouldn’t be so charged, it’s not a good-bye. We are not becoming estranged, it’s just a… _see-you-later_. Perhaps at a time when he isn’t so needed here in the Fire Nation, and I’m not so needed back at home.

I still can’t bring myself to let go of his hand.

“Zuko, I…”

“Katara, I…”

We both quiet at the same time.

A few long moments pass before Zuko breaks the new silence. “I…”

“Katara!” Sokka calls out from the boarding platform. “We’re leaving already!”

“Coming!” I say.

I turn to Zuko, “What were you saying?”

He hesitates. “Nothing. I’ll tell you at … another time.”

_Another time. Right._

I bite my lip.

“You’ll write to me, right?” I ask.

His smile is soft. And sad. “Of course.”

_Of course._

I untwine my fingers from his. 

He watches as the ship departures. I know because I stare at him through the windows.

My hand rests on the crystal in a last attempt to reach for his heat.


	22. Kiss of life

**Katara**

_Don’t die, don’t die, don’t die!_

The words shoot themselves through my mind over and over again as I put all my strength in my healing.

_Don’t die, don’t die, don’t die!_

Am I saying them out loud? I don’t know. I don’t _care_ , just don’t let Zuko die!

Don’t let this war take someone else away from me!

I should have never come out to the Agni Kai chamber, this is my fault! It’s _all_ my fault! I should have known Azula would cheat! I should have known she would exploit his weaknesses! I should have known _I_ was a weakness!

I’m so sorry, Zuko! I’m… _so_ … sorry.

_Don’t die! Please, don’t die! I need you!_

_Please…_

The lightning wound throbs under my hands. It almost feels like a second heart, but it’s not enough, Zuko still isn’t moving. He isn’t…

Boiling tears roll down my face, heated by hopelessness, sorrow and _rage_. They cloud my vision, I can’t see, my eyes hurt. _All_ of me hurts.

_Don’t take him away too!_

His lips are still warm. I kiss them softly, but intensely; I don’t know on whose behalf, if for him to feel me or me to feel him, even if it’s just for one last time. They’re soft. He tastes like salt and blood.

When his eyes open, my heart resumes its beating.

“Thank you, Katara,” he whispers.

The tears are no longer boiling, but cool and fluent, setting the emotions free. “I think I’m the one that should be thanking _you_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap, ladies and gentlemen! Hope you enjoyed the tooth-rotting fluff! 
> 
> In regards of my other fics, I think this will be the first time I'll be drawing instead of writing for Zutara Week, so I'll take a little more time for updating them. Wish me luck! And if you want to see a sample of my art you can check out my Katara WIP here: https://heavensweetheart.tumblr.com/post/624582904115281920/check-it-still-working-on-my-sketch-of-the

**Author's Note:**

> I was on an artist blues because I don't got my tablet with me at the moment, so I decided to draw something on PC no matter how crappy it may be turn out to feel a little better, and I think I'll try to make the effort to illustrate the future chapters.


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